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I am pretending that I care. (I dreamt of him)

What's strange is that his face appears so clearly. Usually when there is true faces, it's my closest friends, meaningful people that holds an importance in my life. He isn't important. Not at all. And he appears so subtly that I didn't even notice when he appeared.

I was screaming at my friend for some reason. She was one of my best friends and I was telling her something. And then I looked up and instead of the friend that I expected to see, I saw him. He gave me a puzzled look because I had screamed at him. But I said "Sorry" because I thought he was another person.

I guess I didn't realize who he was until he left. I'm like.. wait. Isn't he..? But he didn't do anything. He barely even talked. And he just left. Was that supposed to mean anything? All I saw was his expression. Puzzled, yet curious. I know that situation; it's something I've seen on him in real life. He seems to be always questioning. That always makes me wonder. I think that's the reason why I couldn't stop thinking about him in the first place.

Because you always wonder what people think of you. Especially him. He gives clues that he is thinking about you, even if it's slightly bad. Like once, he'd turn away so subtly when I walked past that I knew it was because of me that he turned. Because there was no one else around, and because he was talking. It was so obvious. Maybe I had been paranoid, but later I had found out why he might have felt awkward.

I'm glad that this dream didn't continue on, I guess. I don't want to know. I haven't seen him at all during school anyhow. For all I know, he doesn't exist. Not at school; not in my mind.

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