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I had just newly accepted my fifth hostee, Emily.. and then I recieved another request for hosting. I really had no idea this hosting on a domain is that popular. I feel guilty now, because it's really not my hosting.. it's Daniel's at YoAi.Org. It's on his webspace because I only have one FTP account and only 50 MB of webspace..

I want to think back to the reason I wanted hosting. I wanted us all to be close together.. and I dont think it's working like that. People now are.. well, I want hosting because I don't like those free webservers. I think I should be more strict on this. But I don't want to be one of those snobby domains where they're like.. "Oh.. I'll only host you if I like you" and thats it.

Thats not what I want. *sigh* I want to help.. but it feels so empty and pointless if they're not going to talk to me.. be unresponsive. Well. Maybe I'll just stop hosting for now. Its hard to keep track of whats on their pages, because I'm afraid that YouthOfAmerica is going to get mad if they have any inappropriate content on their site. You see, they're the people that's paying for my domain, so I owe it all to them to follow their rules.

(If only I could just buy this domain, so they won't have to complain.)

I read the "Youth Host Account" features (which I have) and it costs $8 per month and an one time $15 set up fee, which isn't bad. But you see.. they're still paying it for me. So.. if I had paid myself, I'd have to pay $39 for the hosting.. and $16.98 for the domain name. So, that'd be $55.98. Thats still not that bad :) But you know what I can buy with that money? Well. If I did have that kind of money, I'd probably know.

I love Dexter Freebish. "Leaving Town" has such a mellow sound.. something I can listen and sing to all day. I told my friend that its one of those songs you hear everywhere, but you just never actually really pay attention to it or know the name. I just found out the name two days ago.. and when I heard it, I'm like Ooohhh.. because I've heard it so many times (in ALL of them radio stations that I listen to) and I never knew the name.

I was listening to Savage Garden again. I absolutely adore Darren Hayes' sweet voice and the enticing sweet music. I remembered how I had gotten the CD for my 13th birthday. It was the first album that I was totally in love with. You know.. I had gotten awful CDs in the past. Napster wasn't invented then ;) I was in love with "To the Moon and Back" and "A Thousand Words"... "Santa Monica" Wait. I think I liked almost every song.. They were my inspiration.

Although as I think back... my tastes in music have changed a lot. Maybe its because my exposure to music is so vast now that I can choose whats really my favorite. But the only song that I really like then and really like now is "One Headlight" by the Wallflowers. I was so obsessed with the song.. and now, I still like it a lot. Its such an amazing song, though. I want people to play that song at my funeral. (No, I am not joking) Because its kind of sad, and yet, its such a powerful song that it doesn't drive you to cry.

(sigh) These days.. I just cant live without music. I just have to listen to something. I feel so bare without music. And I realized... there are so many good music out there too, that I havent discovered yet. I really like all kinds of music. I find myself liking the background music of Shakespearean films, heehee. Its all guitars and violins and its just lovely. (I just saw "The Taming of the Shrew" today..) But anyway.

Yes, it was a lovely day anyway. Its strange going to school so late. The sun was already fully up.. and it was immensely warm. That is something that never happens. It feels so summerish that I just want to dance around in my swimsuit and jump in a pool.. the nonexistant pool in my background. Yeah, have fun, me! But sun is good to me because I'm always happy when the sun is out like this. I haven't been getting too much sun lately because it had been raining and all.. and had to stay in classes all day. Well, today was a break from that.

I knew today was going to be a strange day when we arrived at school at approximately 11:23am. Yesterday, they had announced that the students shouldn't arrive earlier than 11:25am, so naturally, I thought school started at 11:30.. At by the time we got to the parking lot, it was almost all full.. until the very end of course. So the car had to be parked waaay back there. The first thing I see when I get out of the car is.. errmm, yes, HIM. Oh gosh. At least.. I think its him.. I'm pretty sure. Because if it isn't.. then it'd be stupid to be freaking out over a random guy.

But I knew it had to be him, because I could see him. So I walked as fast as I could, with subtle motions, so he wouldnt think that I'm running away from him (even though I am...) and found my chance for escape when I saw an opening to the school from the back side. I knew it'd be a longer walk, but since I thought that I still had five minutes, it wouldn't be so bad.

No.. only until I went through that path until I realized that school started at 11:25am.. I was all panicking, and kicking myself for going through all this trouble just to avoid someone. Gosh, I am such a scaredy-cat for avoiding him.. I know. But its just better this way.. I dont even think I have a choice! Most people go through a lot of trouble for someone they love.. and I am going through all this trouble for someone I despise. Why dont I just not do anything at all?? But its just more distracting the other way. (sigh)

Today's schedule was... well, strange. Its strange to have lunch right after second period.. and 6th period right after 4th period. (There used to be lunch between those two periods) Well, I still love it, because its later in the day.. and it was perfect weather. The sun was out and its nice and warm.

I want to have this schedule again. Yes. Next week on tuesday, there is going to be a schedule like today.. except that school starts at 11:05. Well.. I can still wake up at 10am and make it :) Heeehee. But I have a sort of biological clock.. I just wake up when I have my full 8 hours of sleep. No matter how lazy I am, I cant fall asleep after that... unless I am sick of course.

Well.. article writing time. I just can't write newspaper articles very well.. mine sounds very essay-ish. Hmmph. Before I fall asleep.. Im going to write at least something.

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