faint shallow of a design
(2001-03-23) 08:08 p.m.
I did it again. I am so obsessive now.. I can't stand this unsatisfaction of my layouts. First, I redesigned the blog, then this. Then probably Comatised itself. (Of course it'd take ages, but knowing me, I'd still do it anyway even though I really don't have the time.) Because you know, its Friday and I can't just wasting my time just staring at the computer. So I just closed my internet browser and opened PSP. And made this design. And I still don't like it. It's so faded and messy. Grr.. why am I *never* satisfied? I feel like I'm always arguing with myself. And what's my argument? Nothing. Each Friday, it's the same thing. I always think the week had gone waaay too fast.. when the weekend had finally come. And I'd wait until Sunday to finish my schoolwork because.. well, one, I'm a big fat procrastinator.. unless its something I'm excited to do.. and I'm "prone" to addictive behavior. That's supposedly a characteristic of Adler's birth order theory. Ooh. I can't believe I still remember that guy's name. Lately, I've been thinking that everything's funny. This person who was sitting next to me in Lit was looking at my French worksheet and saying that he can understand it even though he takes Spanish, not French. Well... Spanish and French are pretty similar. (If you think about it.. France is just north of Spain.. so it should be a bit similar.) Then he started telling me a story about how he asked this othe person how to say the number seven in French, and that person said, "seVON".. you know, seven with a French "accent." And he actually believed that person. Haahaa.. for some reason, I found that so horribly funny.. I laughed so hard (because I'm a person who studied French for 3 years, and hearing this is just... funny) and I think I made him uncomfortable by doing so.. he's like, "Umm, it's not THAT funny." But it is! To me. I know.. people think I'm crazy. I was thinking about taking Graphics Design as an elective.. but my stupid high school doesn't offer it. It only offers stupid Computer Repair.. and technology or something like that. Oh yes.. computer science. That's just so... umm, technical. I like designing.. not those things. I also was about to taking psychology. But my mother had said it was kind of useless as a career.. but you know what? Maybe I like to take it for fun! But I still didn't take it. Instead, I took Art 2 and Journalism/Magazine.. whoohoo. And thats another funny thing. My dad saw my chosen next year's schedule, and he's like.. "What's A R plus 2?" I didn't know what he was talking about.. so I went over.. and realized that he was talking about Art 2!! He thought that the "T" was a plus.. haha. Art seems so fun.. mmh. Except that I'm not good.. the only piece of art I like was my colored pencil one from last year.. I wish I could scan it in for all to see.. but I don't know how. It's.. well, huge. I feel so glued here.. usually, there's so much interaction in the internet world.. but now.. I don't feel like there's really anybody. Just like real life. Everyone's got their own business and ignores me. So, what's going on with you people? Tell me! I can be invisible at school.. but not here :) *yawns* I know that it's just like 8:30pm but I feel like sleeping. I've hardly really slept all week. Thats what I get for not doing my work sooner. Good night.
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